Beginning a New Lifetime

A friend of mine was telling me about his grandmother recently, about how she was married to his grandfather for twenty-something years. That grandfather passed away when my friend was seven years old. His grandmother remarried, and now, thirty-something years later, she has been married to his step-grandfather longer than she was married to his biological grandfather.

I said to my friend, without thinking it out first, that it's amazing how we get so many lifetimes in our one lifetime. Ever since I said those words they have been replaying in my mind, like a loop. A 'this is a significant moment of awareness' loop, and I know I have to pay attention to the subliminal messages locked inside that single statement. This is a turning point in my own life, and I know it.

When his grandmother was married the first time, I bet she never once considered that she would be married to someone else one day. I bet she never considered that in her second marriage she would have a longer lifetime that she did in her first.

I'm sure that she was devastated when her husband passed away. It was probably very hard for her to move beyond that grief too. Being a woman and a mother, I can almost feel that sense of loss. After she remarried, I imagine that she still had moments of grieving for the loss of her old life. But, she lived, she survived it. Now, in her latter years, I'm sure there is an incredible sense of gratitude. Gratitude for all the lifetimes she has had, and the magical intertwining of occurrences that define her existence. A full life, lived.

I see now that my own life will hold it's own lifetimes, and it already has. And, it's okay. It's okay to move out of one, and into another. It's okay to feel loss about it, it's okay to grieve a past lifetime. It's okay to not see the meaning, or understand. It's okay to not know why. It's okay to look beyond right now, and it's okay to anticipate a great new life.

I'm not who I once was. I'm not who I will be either. I'm me though, I'm me living my current lifetime. The me that I will be when I'm 85 will be the me that was created over the course of my all lifetimes.

What I have seen as the end is really just the start of a new beginning. Oh how exciting it is to finally see this. To finally realize that there will be another lifetime after this. I don't know what it is, but I'm there. I'm standing at the threshold, and I've been prepared. I'm ready now, and I know it.